Here is the second part of an email dialogue I had with a reader concerning setbacks.
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Hi!
Thanks for your reply. I have indeed been troubled by anxiety in the past, for many years and in many forms. Also often revolving around issues to do with travel. Over the years my anxiety changed a lot before petering out. I put that down to two things: changing life situation (growing up, leaving home etc) and me attacking the anxiety every way I could. I once asked my doctor what he thought was best for anxiety and he replied “I am a fan of whatever works”. I think that’s important, what works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for another.
I think Claire Weekes’ technique of complete acceptance is great in the short term, especially as it is much better and more empowering than doing nothing. However it does seem to me from what you have said that there are legitimate reasons in your life for you to be stressed and unhappy, and that through tackling those I think you might improve. You can tackle these things in two ways. Either by changing them or by changing your response to them. In reality it is likely to be a balance of both, after all you can’t make MIL do something she doesn’t want to. So do look beyond Claire weekes. I mentioned Jungian therapy and now I have to admit I am no psychological expert! I spent a lot of time with a Jungian therapist that used art a lot. It was strange, you do have to put some trust in the therapist, but I did make dramatically positive steps in my life.
I don’t want to speak out of turn and I don’t know your full situation. But it strikes me that you feel somewhat unappreciated by those around you. If that is the case then I think a good therapist could really help you change your opinion of yourself and how you act around and towards others. This might be one angle to investigate anyway.
Apart from that I also tried hypnosis (don’t recommend it much)
Acupuncture (maybe did me some good)
EFT (Think it changed something, not quite sure what)
CBT (similar to Claire weekes, available on the NHS, no deep analysis which I think I needed – I only ever recommend this for simple phobias)
You say you have counselling. What exactly does this involve? If it’s just time and space to get things off your chest then maybe you should see if you can find a therapist. You might get cheap or free sessions through a training centre if money is a problem.
I never know what to say about these “energy therapies” that promise so much. As I say, I have tried EFT and TFT and I think they did do something. I know someone who is about to have some sessions of this and I am really interested to see what will happen.
I do think making positive changes in your life is the way to start. If you can deal with present unhappiness and also think about past causes and root issues then you will make progress.
Hope to hear from you soon!
This email shows me that anxiety is another issue with many people. It is weird how you get a mini anxiety attack before an event such as a speech, but afterwards you suddenly gain the courage and want to do it again. Keep up the great work on these posts.